Past, Present, & Future

For those of you who attend Riverside, what an amazing teaching by our sweet Linda Marceau today!  If you missed it or would like to watch it, I'm sure our great communications team (aka Adam Schindler!) will have it up shortly. Just to give you a brief trailer version, it really is worth watching in it's entirety, Linda talked about her encounter with the Holy Spirit receiving her gifts and the healing of her heart. She also explained how receiving the full measure of Holy Spirit can bring transformation in our lives. Just look at that picture friends, you tell me that's not transformation! Holy Smokes! I hadn't realized until going through old photos on my computer how much I've changed. The past photo was literally just under 2 years ago. These pictures speak volumes. Crazy...

When I reflect on that time in my life and see the picture from my past. I'm taken back in time. I remember being so unhappy. I was "trying" to make it through a day at a time. I remember having headaches all the time from stress. I'd put a smile on in public and of course "had it all together" in church. But in my alone time and at home, I was depressed. Many nights I cried myself to sleep thinking was this all there was to the rest of my life? I didn't know how to lift my head, I didn't have the strength to pull myself out of my pit and I had settled into a quiet desperation. It became comfortable. Every morning I put on my smile and feeble attempt at a positive attitude like it was a daily wardrobe. Honestly, I didn't know who I was, I didn't know where I belonged, and I was like a chameleon becoming whoever people wanted me to be. I didn't like establishing roots, certainly didn't like vulnerability that was a dirty word.  I think about that verse in Romans 8:38-39 that says "neither death nor life...will be able to separate us from God's love" He knows that somedays living life is as hard as death. Somedays we need to rely on His belief in us because we have nothing left to believe in ourselves.

But then something happens...there's a shift. He puts people in our path to plant hope in our hearts. To take us from dismally desperate to deepening in our faith. Yes friends, He is the lifter of our heads. We don't have to try so hard. We don't have to fake it till we make it. We don't have to suffer in isolation, in our self imposed prisons. So for me, I took God up on his offer to lovingly Father me. I accepted Holy Spirits offer of healing and offering me gifts to help others. I remember noticing that I began to smile more and it wasn't that fake smile I used to put on for daily use, it was a sincere there's joy in my heart so I can smile, smile. I began noticing the beautiful paintings of sunrises and sunsets. Flowers smelled so much more fragrant. I began seeing people differently. I began having a keen awareness for those hurting much like I used to. I also began to trust people more to accept me for me. No more would I color people through assumption whether positive or negative. I learned how to rely on God for my provision, not me. I watched as he blessed me with gifts to be relational with others, to teach, to cultivate community. 

Yes friends, when I look at that "Present" picture, I see a woman who is confident. She knows who she is and she has come into her own. She has shed the labels that were never hers to bear. She has accepted the gifts bestowed upon her by God and by her community that he has brought into her life. Instead of fake smiles and stabs at a positive attitude that is self driven, she clothes herself with grace and joy daily knowing a mighty God goes before her and behind. She knows that vulnerability is not a dirty word but rather a way to honor others and not lose self. She is an amazing mother, full of strength to guide her amazing beautiful son through the storms that may come in life. Her direction comes from her compass that God has provided, no longer from her own past successes and failures. The woman in that picture only looks ahead on the horizon, for she knows her God who loves her so deeply, has great plans for her. She carries in her heart the victories that He has won in her favor and remembers them daily. She shows the world the beauty that only comes from deep precious healing, beauty that only her Savior can create through an original design he sculpted long ago. 

Sometimes we get so busy with day to day living we forget to realize just how far we've been brought in our journey. It takes pictures to show us how empirical the reality is. I know I get on my soapbox often about changing the channel in our lives when we're sick of the same movie playing over and over. People often say "change is hard" or "how much can we really change?" well friends, the proof is in the pudding! I can honestly tell you, I am living proof of the mercy, the love, and the power of our loving Father. Transformation is waiting...are you ready for the journey?