Shapeless & Empty

Genesis 1:1-4 “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was without shape and empty, and darkness was over the surface of the watery deep, but the Spirit of God was moving over the surface of the water. God said, “Let there be light.” And there was light! God saw that the light was good, so God separated the light from the darkness.”

Before we know God, we are without shape. We are empty. We are in darkness. But, God moves over us. He chooses us. He loves us. He permeates us and He commands, “Let there be light.” And there is light! And because He gives us light, we are good. We are no longer without shape and empty, because we bear His likeness. We are no longer in the dark, because His light is brighter than the sun and casts no shadow. 

I wonder, have you ever felt formless and without shape? Do you wonder if you had shape what you would look like, what you might feel like? Do you ever feel so covered in darkness that you wear it like a heavy cloak, too heavy to remove? Does it crush you from the weight of it? 

Many years ago, I suffered an accident from my own stupidity. I chose to go kayak on the river after many days of rain. The river crested that day, unbeknownst to me. I had never kayaked before and ended up standing vertically under the river. I was victim of a tide pool from much debris piled up underwater from the raging river. My life jacket ties became tangled in all the debris under the water and I could not remove it. I remember fighting with everything I had to get to the top of the water, I could see the light through all of the logs and branches, but it was of no use. I finally resigned my time had come. I quit fighting. Suddenly, peace washed over me and the most overwhelming spirit of love. I asked the Lord to please watch over Jake every day and remind him how much I loved him, how much I missed him and how proud I was of him. I remember a knowing too hard to put into words. Then I woke on the side of the river bank. How I got there and how long I had been under, I have no idea. 

What I do know is I was under the formless and shapeless deep. I know I was surrounded by the darkness of the unknown. I know I could see the light hovering over me. I know I could trust the Lord to take care of my son in my absence. I know I was given another chance. I know today, I get to live helping others. I am able to share my story. I have the humble privilege of hearing your stories too. I get a chance to love and be loved by a man who loves the Lord more than he loves me. I get to watch my son grow into the most amazing young man surrounded by a beautiful woman in his life and a dog who might as well speak he is so human. 

I know the Lord found me in my life, shapeless and empty and filled me with His presence, His love and His grace. You see friends, just the way He created all things in a rhythm that is ordered and beautiful, He brings that same order and beauty to our lives. He sees us and He calls us good.