Fear of Joy

Just drove in over the weekend. To be honest, it was quite an emotional drive home. I wept when I could no longer see the mountains around me or in the rearview mirror. They had been my faithful companions for the last 6 days. I had witnessed their transformation. They went from having the tiniest pockets of golden treasure to huge highways of gold leading to the top of their majesty. Each day that past, the mountains were so welcoming, proud of their evolution and happy to share their hues of orange, burgundy and flaming gold with passers by. The mountains were a wonderful reminder that time stands still for no one. Despite what is happening in your life, there is change good or bad, there is going to be a difference so what will you do with it? How will you prepare for it? How will you impact others because of it? 

I read an article in the New York Times this morning, researchers are now discovering there is a “fear of joy” that is permeating not only our society here in the US but globally. The research has shown that it affects most countries except for third world countries where there seems to be no difference in their day anyway according to the article. A “fear of joy”? I had to read the article a couple of times because I could hardly believe it. First off I looked up the proper definition of joy so here it is— Definition of JOY 1 a : the emotion evoked by well-being, success, or good fortune or by the prospect of possessing what one desires. — Perhaps therein lies the problem?

We’ve decided, according to Merriam Webster, that joy has to do with well-being, success and good fortune or by having what we want? So, there’s a fear of being well, a fear of success, a fear of good fortune and a fear of having what we want…hmmmm. Are we saying then that it’s easier to be unhealthy, just doing ok and not really believing in the desires of our heart? Then I suppose the other shoe will never drop? We won’t be disappointed when things change? I don’t understand this all or nothing mentality. If you do, please help me. But look around, it’s true isn’t it? We have an epidemic level problem with our health from heart disease to obesity. I’ve met more people and ask them about connecting with their heart, do they know what their passion is…they have no clue. 

Many people weighed in and left comments. Most agreed with the article saying that this made sense with their perspective of the world. But there were the few that said what I believe is true too. Life is neither good or bad, it just is. We can choose how we respond to the various scenarios life hurls our way. Joy is not situational, nor does it have to be. Joy is knowing we are deeply rooted in who we are and we do not allow what is temporal to create a permanent perspective. Much like the mountains, we know our seasons change. Along with the beauty of fall comes the dead of winter and following that the rebirth of spring. And, as a sweet friend pointed out just the other day, the winter is when there is the most growth in our lives just like the beautiful trees in Colorado. They are dormant, there are no leaves to take the nourishment from the roots. 

Sometimes when we have no fruit, no leaves in our lives, it’s when we just get to be. It’s when we get to prepare for that season of rebirth. We get to choose to be as steadfast as the mountains in all their splendor. Time is constantly moving forward, never backward, will we?