From Repurposed Find to Life Found Day 6

Day 6

Today I had the pleasure of serving with my work family at Child Safe. For those of you who don’t know what Child Safe does they’re angels to so many every day. You see, when a child is abused or there is suspected abuse they can be brought here and all the services needed are under one roof. It saves the child the pain of reliving the story over and over and the staff there does an amazing job of creating a comforting soothing environment during what can be a horrific event. It was very humbling to say the least, the impact that is made and the message sent during that harrowing time can make all the difference in their lives. They are a shelter from the massive storm that is disrupting these beautiful lives. Child Safe is a haven during a volatile time when all their trust is shaken. 

It reminded me of our innocence that is ravaged when our hearts are broken, when our idea of trust is stolen from us, when our once seemingly “normal” worlds are rocked and we’re left scratching our heads trying to figure out what anything means anymore. 

As a victim of abuse, I speak from experience. When it happened to me as a kid, I didn’t understand why. Reflecting back, I believed it was my fault. In fact, I know that is when my “orphan heart” was first birthed. It’s like falling down the rabbit hole, and you’re not certain about the world you’ve just been surrounded by. You struggle to make sense of things. Without having that canopy of security and love, you begin to doubt people. You’re not sure who you can really trust. What’s strange is it seems your walls go up with people that seem to be really sincere and yet it’s easier to let people in that you know are just as bad as those that hurt you originally. You see friends, there’s a familiarity that comes with the territory. We begin to accept that part of our story as part of who we are not just unfortunate events in our lives. We begin to believe that’s all we were created for. We begin to repurpose our lives. We agree with the hurt and the wound and make it fit into our lives like trying on clothes that are ill fitting but we buy them anyway. 

Have you ever done that friends? Is there an event in your life that has so deeply disturbed you that you’ve almost made a vow without realizing it? For example, “I can never trust anyone with my heart.” “No man can be trusted.” “I will not allow myself to be hurt like that again.” “I will not be rejected so I will fulfill other’s expectations.” Without realizing it, these vows carry over into the rest of our lives. They can begin innocently enough due to the initial experience but with each experience following, they almost become our filters for how we’ll respond to situations. That’s what we’re reflecting about today, vows that we’ve allowed to become part of who we are. 

In your quiet time today, consider some of the events in your life that have led you to make a vow, good or bad. Think about those vows and what they tell you to believe about certain experiences in your life. Since we’ve begun this time of reflection, has it become easier to spot these things? When you’re ready journal what these vows are and try to trace them back to their experience of origin. Ask Jesus to help you break those vows and begin reshaping your belief system. 

James 5:12

New Living Translation (NLT)

12 But most of all, my brothers and sisters, never take an oath, by heaven or earth or anything else. Just say a simple yes or no, so that you will not sin and be condemned.